Exchange of Realities

For DiceMonkey, who got me riffing about this yesterday (thanks for the inspiration!), and for anyone else to whom I have never gotten around to explaining this properly.

If you’re from the gamer side of my audience, you’ve probably read something in epic voice. The writers might have managed to avoid it, depending on breadth and specialization in the fantasy genre. It’s a useful thing to be able to write, but far too easy to abuse; as a result, it’s one of my pet peeves.  I can’t take it seriously for very long.

To explain it, I’ll have to use an example. Let me see:

(Obligatory pause as the nose is pinched and the eyes are closed)

Long has epic tone towered over the landscape of the fantasy novel and game. It comes with thunder, adjectives its sword and adverbs its shield. Never does it state when a metaphor or simile will do; nor does it feel that there is such thing as too many words in a paragraph. And its metaphors must be Bold, and Intense, and Feel Like They Should All Be Capitalized To Add Extra Gravity. When read aloud, it feels weighty, and every other word clamors as ravens above a battleground, calling to be emphasized, to be emboldened, to be shouted forth. A character of this style cannot merely walk, nor eat, nor even excuse himself for the privy; no, even these most mundane of tasks sound like the fate of the world rests upon them.

Unfortunately, this voice is highly popular in fantasy. Yes, I mean unfortunately. It’s very hard for people coming in from other genres to take seriously, and it gets heavy after a while. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I can’t go more than three or four chapters of this at a sitting (and I’m the kind of person who can read almost anything in one go otherwise).

This isn’t to say it shouldn’t be used at all. It’s very good for legends, particularly when being used to set the legend apart from the rest of the story. In cultures where boasting is an art form in and of itself, this is also a useful style (though I find it a lot harder to believe that such people talk like that all the time). And of course, a lot of slack can be cut for poking fun at it!

But novel-length? Please, don’t. And even if you must use the tone in general, do not write a novel in this voice in first person. The sheer presumptuousness, the utter feel of “I think I am the greatest hero ever to walk the face of the earth”, is enough to make even the most sympathetic character seem like he needs to be taken down a notch or two.

Similarly, unless you know the rest of the group is specifically into this sort of thing, think twice before using it in a backstory or a game description. Particularly with D&D levels below three or four or so. And—and I know there are people who are going to object, but I have a reason—starting builds in Exalted. You’re not that epic yet. (I’m inclined to say this still goes for established characters who actually have notches for major setting antagonists on their blades. “And lo, I stabbed forth, and my blade ripped through ghostly flesh, and the mighty foe was shoved into the beam of holy purifying light, and its screeches as it burned away resounded through the atmosphere, but its dying curse destroyed many of my brave comrades” doesn’t impress me near as much as “So there he was, between me and the beam. I couldn’t kill the guy myself—his being dead didn’t help matters—but I could certainly push him back. The good news was that it vaporized him. The bad news was that he decided to take most of the rest of the people there with him.” More on this here.

Like it or hate it, it’s best to know how to use it.